Marathon Training

Today I was supposed to run 20 miles.

I didn't.

I have not had a failed run like this in a long time, a long long time, and I forgot how incredibly demoralizing it is.  I ran 10 miles before I just completely fell apart.  From the beginning my hip and knee were hurting, but they just kept getting worse, and at mile ten I was making the pathetic whimper noises that I like to reserve for mile 19 or so.  I sat down just off the trail and called my husband, sobbing, because I just couldn't go any farther.  It hurt.  It really hurt, and I debated whether I would be making myself worse by continuing, but I finally admitted to myself that the debate was unnecessary because I just... couldn't. 

I sat and I ate a Larabar and drank some water, and I cried a bit more.  Then I tried to run a few steps before giving up and walking slowly home.

I am trying to figure out what to do now in terms of training, and also trying to get my body back to cooperating with my whole marathon plan.  Today I am mostly putting ice on various parts of myself and watching Sports Night.  Tomorrow I will be on a plane all day.  Through the week I am going to play it by ear and see how running goes, but I'm going to try to get a lot of midweek miles in because I've been slacking on that.  Then I'll re-attempt the 20 miler on Friday if I'm up for it.

This really sucks.